Day 42

Style: Hatha
Teacher: Shambhu
Studio: Sivananda Ashram

Out into a morning bathed in darkness, we began our silent walk. Every day at the Ashram begins with Satsang - meditation, chanting and philosophic discussion. Today is different. Today we move in silence, out into the woods. Walking the long winding country roads, the world still asleep, there was no sound in the air aside from the crunching of snow beneath the different sets of shoes. I could feel the cold creeping in all around me, but remained safe and snug under warm layers of fabric. The trees were black shadows, peering out at us, wondering who these strange quiet creatures were. Entering a clearing, we all stopped and stood silently as the sun rose. It was invisible in the grey winter skies, but made its presence known as light began to slowly wash over the wilderness. Turning around, we began the long walk back to the Ashram. As the world around me slowly came alive, the dark trees regained their rich, forest-green tones. Sleepy birds began to chirp and the pure white was returned to the blanketed snow, wisps of icing-sugar flakes drifting lazily through the winter air. Placing one foot in front of the other out here in the wild has got me thinking of a pristine planet, pre human footprint. My mind wanders further, wondering if this truly is our original home. Sometimes, looking up at the stars, I can't help but feel like we're from someplace else. Why do I get this feeling that the town of my birth is actually somewhere out there, light-years away, deep in the vast expanse of outer space, far beyond the reach of human imagination?

Back on the road, Sivananda is disappearing behind me, dissolving into past experience. My intention was to stretch out in the passenger seat on the ride home, reflecting on the weekend and writing about it. As it happens, I'm at a loss for words. I can only stare out at the passing horizon, quietly observing the outside world in motion. Most of what has transpired has yet to fully sink in. Closing my eyes and leaning back in my chair, I feel sleep start to lurk around me. I let go and fade out of 3D physical existence into something beyond, something I never return with any memory of.


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